Those days

Have you ever had, you know, one of those days? One of those days where it's all you can do to not just scream? You know you have. We all have. They're inevitable. I guess my question is: how do you handle them when you have to handle them? When there is no choice. When you can't just go home and crawl back into bed, or maybe just drink yourself into oblivion. What do you do then?

I find I talk to myself then....just in my head....telling myself to stay calm, don't snap at people, it's not their fault I'm having a bad day. But sometimes? Sometimes....I just wonder 'how can you possibly be THAT stupid?'. And then I realize it is a little bit their fault that I'm having a bad day. Sure, maybe it wasn't great before they came along, but they certainly haven't done anything to improve it either.

Lately, I've found myself at that point an awful lot. I'm forcing myself to not be short with...well, with everyone. I'm restless and lazy, tired and wide awake, discontent but happy enough with all the things in my life. I'm ying to my own damn yang. I know I need a change, but I'm not sure what kind. I know that I'm not where I thought I would be, but I no longer have a clear picture of where that is, so I don't know how to get there. And I'm finding other people's lack of conviction and surety and their general wishy-washiness frustrating.....despite my own.

But one thing I DO know is that I will figure it out. I always do.